Tuesday 13 February 2018

Open Letter to Jenifer on Valentine Day


I am always glad to have tidings from the kind, faithful friend of my youth whose messages of love made my heart yearn to see her again and again.

My hands were shaking as I opened your letter yesterday at the University Stadium. Before I even read it, I was in tears because I could remember how your voice was softer and seemed  to be shrinking when I first met you in my first year at University of Nigeria Nsukka.

 Was that on Valentine day? “Yes, It was.

Honestly, that was the first time I saw hurt in your eyes. I do not know why I am writing this to you, because I just met you many years ago. You know,  the more you see someone the more you know more things about him.

I expected your letter before yesterday but you just surprised me, you seemed frazzled and a little irritated when you handed the letter to me.
 What do you mean when you say you love me? What do you mean by these your words?

"I never loved anyone but you, never with that love which you alone merit, which is yours alone, which has always been in the depths of my heart, and will be there as long as I live".

That secret colloquy I think had become a dark night, and the chamber, lighted only by the feeble glimmer of a lamp, in such a state of comparative gloom which would have been a reminder to the young people at any time to provide themselves with more light, but they did not think so. The young people have refused to understand the real meaning of Love. There is an abysmal difference between love and sex. But now they use them interchangeably.  
Let me ask you again... what do you mean when you say you love me?

If you say you love me, can you die for me? Do you love me because of what you will get from me. Just like many women would do, when they want something from you, you become their sweetheart, their honey, and everything... Who is fooling who?.
Can you defined the object of love when you say you love me? Is your object of Love the pleasure? Is it the intrinsic goodness or utility?

When almost every bloom of Spring had fallen, and only a few, withered and pale, clung to the parent stem, a leaf exclaimed to its companions: “how feeble and useless are these blossoms, though they have enjoyed but now they no longer. If she is gentle and kind to everyman; she never says “No, I won't” or “No, get out,” and never disagree with men. She keeps her clothes neat and clean, and always have quarrel with her father and mother, and not even interested in God.

I shout with Eliakim Littell, that Human hearts beat now as they did then, and are alike swayed by doubts, and fears, and hopes, with LOVE reigning above all. Thou, ' YOUTH of modern days, sighing in vain for some cold-hearted damsel; thou, dreaming maiden, who worshippest one above all, calling this devotion, respect, admiration—anything but love; and thou, calm philosopher, who hast suffered and ... He was not like those moody, sentimental lovers, always sighing and pining; still less was he addicted to those...

 Let me tell you the truth, if you say you love me... Let your object of your love be intrinsic goodness not pleasure or utility. Good people love each other because of what they are in themselves. They do not use humanity in others as a means to another thing rather an end. Friends are those who wish and do good for each other. Friends are those who grieve and rejoice with another.

Since friendship lies more in loving says Aristotle, it will seem that the virtue of friendship is to love.

And lastly, let your Love be sacrificial.  As in John 3:16 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

Remember that in 1 John 4:8 God is Love, if God is Love then if I tell you that I love you, then you can substitute God with Love. In other words, I God You. Any love that has no connection with God is not a perfect Love. I LOVE YOU. Happy Valentine Day and as today marks the beginning of the Lenten period (Ash Wednesday) I wish you a wonderful Lantern period  By Onuh Justus Izuchukwu

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